beautiful things

what are the most beautiful things that have ever happen to you and touches your heart?

for me...i'm glad i have my dogs for accompany...although sometimes i've neglected them...but never once did they abandon me....i still remember there were once, after a big quarrel with cc....i cried in my room alone....and kenji, my maltese (at that time i only had him) is just right beside me....he just look at me, snuggle up close to me and he did the most amazing thing....he stand on his hinds and lick off the tears from my face.....after that he will just sit beside me.....occasionally turning his head over and look at me, as if he's checking to see if i'm alright....then he rest his head on my leg and just stay with me throughout the night...

although i dont have a beautiful marriage...i'm glad a had a very sensible daughter....though at times she piss me off...but most of the time she is well behaved....when i'm down and out...she would just help me if she have the means to....i'm really fortunate to have her by my side....i love you my girl =)

i had a wonderful coach too....have been following him since i'm 13 years old...learning dragon dance from him....thanks him for always being there for me...although at times i can get real difficult....but he's been really patient with me....we had our fair share of argument....but never once did we have bad blood....only him i guess...can really put up with my nonsense and rubbish hahaha...and i promise...once a mentor forever my mentor...thanks for the help he've rendered to me all along. i really appreciate it =)

and my naggy mum...although she often piss me off and do stupid things to me...till an extend that i thought of moving out and leave her alone....i knew she love me...but she's using all the wrong method...from me to my daughter....but still...im thankful that she did help me out and stand by me when its needed (most of the time i got to knock some sense into her before she know whats happening) hahaha....i may seems cold towards her...but im seriously appreciating all that she've done for us....thank you mum!

hmmmm...but sad to say...till now...none of the men i've met manage to touch me in my heart...if i really had to choose one...i guess maybe its tong....my relationship with him is very short...but i would have to admit he is really very good to me...fetch me to work in the morning if he could....always giving me the attention i need....still remember there was once...he went back to melaka during cny (he's a malaysian but got his PR in SG)...i went over to meet him...we spend the most memorable time there with him acting as my tour guide...bringing me around for food and shopping and keeping me accompany throughout my stay...when i have to come back to singapore for work....he actually drove all the way from melaka to singapore just to send me back and he went back to melaka again after dropping me at home....sweet of him isnt it =)....when he came back to SG after his cny leave....the first thing he did was to call me and meet me up...and of cos not forgetting he offered to bring my dad for check up when i'm not free on the day itself...how many men out there can do all these???....but well...happiness dont last....due to some personal reason..we broke off....i really wonder how is he now...hope things goes well with him....

looking back now.....i suddenly realise not alot of things touched me in my heart hahaha....am i consider cold blooded or what? anyway...its not easy to find someone whom can really reach into your heart...i'm glad i met the above mention...thank you for the love and care i've got from them...love them lots~

been kinda bz for the past week...training on monday to thursday.....friday and saturday performance...sunday off to malaysia seremban for the free style lion dance competition....

performance overall still consider acceptable ba....been so many years since i did dragon dancing...although a few hiccups occur...i'm still glad i was given the chance....not the most perfect one but i do treasure the time spend training with them =) my bro told me to join them back for their every thursday dragon training but i'm still hesitating about going bcos it just seems so weird....i'm suppose to only help them for this 2 performance....and moreover we are from different troupes.....maybe i'll check with boon before i make any decision ba...

today 2 of my good friends are feeling moody and unhappy....although i cant really do anything to help...i really hope they can cheer up....

will be going to seremban again this coming weekend with my longshi.com kakis....saturday and sunday i'll be away from singapore for the competition again....

its been 2 months plus since i last saw cc....have i gotten use to it? i guess somehow ba....

haha and lastly...i found out something really childish done by a person....its just so lame and pathetic of that someone for having to resort to using this way hahaha....this just goes to shows how "matured" that person is....anyway...cant be bother by all these lame kukus lolz....to hell they go!!!! cheers to my life~~~~

1 more day to performance

woooo...1 more day to go and i will have to perform...kinda nervous as its been ages since i did dragon dance....im tensed up too that i will run in the wrong direction as the dragon and also worried i couldnt catch up with them as they are reallly fast lor....been trying real hard to remember the "tao shi".....hopefully tonight training i can get things right....kaka is helping to run their dragon and isabel will be helping out with their instruments too....hope she can handle it.....

god bless me, kaka and isabel *pray*

training

found this pic hidden somewhere in my wardrobe...decided to scan it up to my pc hahahaha....know where am i? i'm number 4 dragon pearl from the left with the black white dragon lolz....how i miss those days....this pic is taken in 1993 or 1994 national day parade....cant really remember le

will be helping CJH with their performance on this coming friday and saturday...went for the training last night....didnt really join them in the training as i'm busy trying to remember the route they run...they are really fast lor and i'm kinda worried i cant chase up with them hahaha....

there will be training for these few days...tonight i have to go down again....kinda enjoy the whole process....and if chance permit...i would like to take part in the luminous dragon dance competition once again...i really enjoy the feeling of the competition and the whole process of training hard for the day....hopefully my dream comes true....

frozen heart

mcame across a sentence in facebook....

When there's a girl who doesn't cry anymore , it's not because she's heartless , but because she was so hurt , she can't feel anymore ..

how true can this sentence be? i must say i agree with it....when it come to a stage where a girl was hurt times and again....that definitely wont turn her into a wonder woman or superwoman.....but instead it will numb her heart....her heart will just get chiller and chiller.....till its frozen and the number of times the heart beat will gradually decrease too....till it stop....sad isnt it....

sometimes i really find women amazing....they can withhold lots of heartache and disappointment...she can even give chances and chances to the man she loved....but men? they will never be able to even allow a speck of dust in his eyes.....do we still call that equal? of cos there are still the minority =)

i think i'm really beginning to let go....lots of things just doesnt seems to matter anymore....from alot of incidents....i just gather that our love have moved somewhere else.....hmmmm....in fact i've started to live life by myself since last year june.....perhaps its a way of preparing myself for the future battle alone....well....it may be alone, it may be not haha

we are still together in fact...and i've chose to let fate decide where we should go....what is meant to be mine will eventually be mine....what is not will never be.....i'm just tired of trying and trying....i'm just tired of being the only actress in this show....no others....its just Me, I and Myself....asking the same thing everyday will only make me sick haha.....i gave up asking...

its coming 8 years soon....one more month to go.....i guess what the older folks say were right afterall...long-run relationship will just tired both parties out....its either both get attached when both reach the 2nd to 3rd year of dating or the chances of getting married will just get lower and lower....me? seriously i have not thought of marrying him ever since i've met him due to his "that time status"....not even till he told me abt the marriage plan when he's inside given that his status is back to normal now....everything is just so vague that i dont even want to hold on any hopes to it....perhaps i'm tired...really tired.....

Sometime you just have to hold your head up high, blink away the tears and say good-bye....

joyous mood

went steamboat earlier on with cz, yap, jed wee and zhihui....have a very enjoyable meal together...somehow or rather...our topic start off with dogs....jed then say he was looking to buy another dog.....i then tried my very best and ask him to adopt instead of buying hahaha....zhihui say he looking for a dog too...i then promise them i'll help them keep a lookout for their preferred breed.....its really nice when i see them getting interested in adopting when they start asking me about adoption procedure.....anyway i didnt paint them a beautiful picture on adoption....instead i intro them to the cruel fate of puppy mill....as usual they didnt know this thing even exist....singaporeans are really not well informed of this thing and its sad when i see people buying and buying puppies off the petshops or farms.....cant our government do something about it and let singapore be a better place to be in? cant singapore be an animal friendly place too? haiz....why did singapore become a multi racial country? why cant we be like those Caucasians countries where most of them love dogs and welcome them everywhere....when can all this happen? its sad to see dogs being discriminate at most of the place in sg...its sad when we humans treat those dogs as dogs and didnt know how to respect these animals....most of the times i do feel that human beings are the most cruel creatures in the world....i hereby wish that karma shall befall those who abuse their human rights on helpless animals....i really hope one fine day....our people are more tolerant of these animals and learn how to respect them....if only...i hope....

flattered

kinda flattered hahaha...but its for me to know for you to find out why am i flattered lolz....anyway....i'm feeling good today....cz asking me for steamboat tonight at bt timah....i have already onz her =) miss cz so much too....will take lots of pics on our steamboat and tag all my dear friends like how they always tag me with pics of their food lolz....

yesterday had a very long talk with my bro...i think 2 hrs plus....can feel the phone burning my ear....he emo again lor....so i lend him my ears and hear him blabber on and on....found out a little secret of his hahahaha...anyway i believe thats a passing stage only...

need to do housework soon....staying at the upper floor sometimes sucks big time...cos of the dust....haiz....mop liao next day dusty again....sianz....

dunno why i just feel over the moon today leh.....hmmmm....i guess its bcos of a joke i've heard....kinda funny i guess....it has got something to do with self entertaining de lolz.....some bo liao and lame thing la hahaha....anyway its over and i'm glad =)

i love tamtam, giangian, dindin, kaka and of cos not forgetting my cc~~~~

thai songs

this two song reminds me of HOS....reminds me of my thai friends too....wondering how are they getting on....hope everything goes well with them =)

spring cleaning~~

its spring cleaning time!!!!!! no its not chinese new year approaching hahahaha...my spring cleaning refers to my heart....now its time to spring clean my heart and get rid of all the trash.....unwanted memories...unwanted friends...unwanted shit lolz....

will need to go thru alot of things to get things sort out....deleting unwanted stuffs from my usual connection....will definitely need some time....meanwhile i just enjoy my life...enjoy being with my fun-to-be friends....enjoy life with cc....to hell with all those rubbish~~~~~yeah!!!!! lolz

just wondering....why on earth did god create human into different characters? to create special-ness? to create more interesting lives? to create more chaos? hahahaha....i guess its the latter because if thats not what he have in his mind....then there will be no wars, fighting, quarrelling and stuffs....sometimes i find fate so amusing....link strangers to become friends....then from friends change back to strangers again....weird isnt it lolz....so in short its just nature wanting us to hurt one another....no one is ever perfect in a way...i guess that makes up to the salt n spices in our lives.....without all these people...life would be boring yea hahaha....but sometimes i do feel very amuse by certain humans reaction or behaviour towards certain issue....they always give me a good laugh to brighten up my day =P

well...so my theory of being with animals are much much more better than humans is correct....at least with animals, if they ever bite me..it just simply means i mishandle them or cause discomfort to them....unlike humans....i always have to guess what they are thinking and stuff....tiring lor....my brain cells are decreasing as times goes by lolz....

why would anyone expect perfection in another person when they arent perfect them self?? pot calling the kettle black?? or just another case of "i'm saint you are devil"?? i'm never a fake person...its either u like me or you hate me kind....i'm also a damn fucking straight person...like means like....dont like means dont like....if i sense anything wrong...i'll just ask....i prefer to have a heart to heart session then keeping it bottled up and allowing "misunderstanding" (if there's any) to gets further.....trying to be cool and keep everything to yourself seriously does not help at all....i wont say you are great nor will i be bother by how you are acting lolz.....anyway the "you" i'm using now refers to general term just in case anyone thought i'm referring to them =)

i have no qualms on dropping anybody as a friend when i find that they arent worth my time....whats the point of behaving plastic infront of each other....waste of time isnt it....

of cos i'm aint no saint myself....i have my weird characters, my imperfectness, so even if one doesnt appreciate me...there will sure be others who does....friends are just passing clouds....some stay while most goes....there is really nothing to feel sad about....i guess thats life =)

random post

hmmmm....just a random post tonight....

weather nowadays hasn't been good....one moment hot one moment cold...weird...

this month i've got 2 wedding invitations -_-"....pocket gonna burn a big hole hahahaha....but its nice seeing people getting married....so sweet....plus the meeting up with all my friends...i just loved it =D

end of may i'm going oversea with my longshi.com kakis....not going very far...only to malaysia ,KL to watch pole jumping lion dance competition...

recently i'm really enjoying my life...love all the people around me....love all those happenings....me and cc also getting along fine =D

my younger bro, kaka have fly off to HK....hope he enjoy himself there....as for tamtam, my dear friend....she stay in HK for more than a month already and still not wanting to come back hahahaha....guess she's migrating soon lolz...

looking forward to my genting trip with my friends in july...its been ages since i last went there....miss the cool cool weather.

made some really great friends too...whom can put up with all my nonsense hahahaha....all of them are really great to be with =)

thaddea went for her virgin filming this month too...saw "alamak" and a new actress, sorry cant recall her name =X ......pics can be found at my facebook....although filming is tough job....but it's indeed a nice experience....looking forward to the show too which will be in cinema on august...

going to plan for my trip to HK too...hopefully i can return to tsingyi asap....miss my friends there....

hahaha...reading back on this post then i realise its indeed very random...or rather a summarize of what have happen.....everytime when i think of blogging i just get stuck....i guess its time to make some changes liao....will keep you guys update again =)

childhood memories

awwww.....suddenly miss my childhood days so much....not that i'm very old now but memories of my past just came flowing back to me....miss the times i'm in school...always getting into trouble hahaha....miss those times when i'm out having fun with all my friends....miss those times when i have many young men admiring and courting me lolz.....miss those times when i can dress till chio chio go party.....miss those times when i can be so carefree....not that now i no longer have all this privilege....but its just getting lesser hahahahaha.....now i can only envy the youngsters and their lifestyle....i just have too much commitment and i cant just do as and what i like now....haiz...memories....

Movies

was kinda busy for the past week....friday attended long shi post cny dinner (30/04/2010)....then kaka, minlong, miner, bel and me went over to cineleisure swenson for ice cream...long nu join us at 4am plus for his supper lolz...suppose to meet heng and guys at ratchada but due to the 2 underage we had had with us...the idea was abandon. we slack till morning then went off separately.

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01/05/2010 - went watch ip man 2 with my bro, bel, heng, ben and qiang at toa payoh central...the cinema sucks big time...if not for the fact that we found tickets there...dont think we will go there and watch too...i was actually perspiring through out the entire show zzzzz...apart for the cinema...i must admit this is really a splendid movie....i would give it a rating of 4.5/5....somehow i'm really touch by this movie....ip man really did us chinese proud hahaha...highly recommeded....after the movie we went over to toa payoh ave 5 for our supper....after that heng send me home.

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02/05/2010 - bro once again jio us for movie....was actually fix on the day before to watch iron man 2....woke up today at 12+ and start asking around see who wanna watch....in the end we got 11 people for this show....bro, heng, qiang, min, bel, NSL, long nu, joseph, kaka, jingyuan and me....once again tickets from various cinema were taken....end up we watch at tiong bahru plaza....we took our dinner at bie fu before we head for the show....hmmm....perhaps its bcos i didnt catch part 1....i just couldnt catch what the show is all about....didnt know what they are saying too lolz....this movie rating i will give a 3.5/5....still consider a not bad movie....just that perhaps its not suitable for me =P bro was asking us what show to watch tml when everybody start laughing at him asking are we having movie marathon.....everyday watch show....guess no one wanted so i guess we will be taking a rest till this weekend ba....